10.04.2010

October again.



It's October again.
The trees are abandoning their leaves &
You have abandoned me.

Okay, so maybe that isn't true...
Maybe I abandoned you.
All I know is that I'm alone &
broken open.

Half empty.
Life & blood slowly spilling through the cracks.
The cracks I tried to seal with glue.
Over & over... and over.

Nothing works.
NOTHING.

Trying is useless.
I am useless.
I am nothing.
Nothing without you, that is.

I don't understand who I am anymore.
I don't understand why I'm here anymore.
I don't understand.
And sometimes I don't want to.

Oh, but I want.
I want so much, I want to want, I need to want.
And how I need to be needed.

Does anyone want me?
Does anyone need me?
NO.
So why is there still a hint of life flowing through my veins?

If there is no one, than I am nothing.
I am nothing, absolutely nothing, if there is no one.

Maybe it's my fault that I'm broken,
but the only thing I know is that I need you to fix me.
Please come for me!
Put me back together before my life is poured out.

- CEE

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